Coffee!

GENERATION	Frequency	Type	Place	Quote
Veteran	One per day in the morning	Long black or cappuccino (usually instant)	Make instant at home but occasionally go out to a café.	“I’m not a connoisseur, I just drink coffee”
Boomer	Approximately four per day	Mocha Kenya, or latte, or Mug-a-chino. Flat White, Instant Blend 43, Espresso machine… etc	Café/Home/Starbucks/etc	“At home I make the Nescafe pods”… “Well I prefer the coffee bags”… “Instant all the way”… “Out at a café is better”... “No plunger is the way I do it”
X	None --- Twelve per day	Locally roasted and fair trade	Home espresso machine preferred or local café (NEVER STARBUCKS!)	“We brew it better at home, but if I must go out, I only go to “---“ because it’s the best coffee in town. They match the shots perfectly with the size of the coffee.”
Y	Socially or to get out of work	Skinny Caramelised Mochachino frappe, double shot with cream and topped with caramel.	This place is the coolest (or most unique) and everyone goes there.	“Why make it yourself? Coffee is a social thing.”
Z	Two or three per day	Every type as long as it’s organic and I can make it myself.	I brew the best coffees myself so why go anywhere else?	“I started on baby chinos when I was two and have now perfected a double shot, locally roasted organic coffee which I brew on our state of the art coffee machine at home.”

GENERATION	SUPERLATIVE	EXCLAMATIONS
Veteran	Splendid/ Pleasant	Jiminy Cricket/Oh my!
Boomer	Brilliant	Great
X	Excellent/Perfect	Wow
Y	Awesome/Rad/Wicked/Sweet/Awesome/ Amazing/etc	OMG/Cool/Awesome/Wow/
Z	OMG	OMG

Dear Gen Y

Dear Gen Y,

We know,  you’re the love of your life, we understand. You dream of your super dooper future and gasp in awe of it’s greatness, you spend hours perfecting your myspace and facebook profiles and love nothing more than posting your  every whim on tumblr. Breaking up is always hard, so here are some handy hints on how to get over your self.

1. Deflate your ego. Take some time off from the online world. We know you may look amazing on facebook, seem like you’re the bee’s knees on blogspot but have you actually achieved anything tangible in the past few months? How about we give you a little time to think on that one

2. Serve others. We know you’ve got big dreams and an amazing future ahead of you but serving others is a great way of broadening your perspective and helping you to see the bigger picture, the full one…you know the one I mean, the one with other people in it besides just yourself.

3. Get old school.  Taking the time to learn some old school manners and etiquette will earn the respect of baby boomers and gen x’ers alike and show everybody just how not self absorbed you really are.

Following these handy hints will have you over yourself and moving on in no time.

Xoxo